Thanks:

1. The Spirit.

2. The gospel.

3. My testimony.

Thoughts:

You'll have to excuse me if I get on a bit of a soap box for a minute. I've just been thinking more lately about our consumer driven and "beauty" crazed society. It can be easy to fall into. I think its good to take care of your appearance, and we certainly don't need to live and Amish lifestyle to stay in keeping with gospel principles... but sometimes the lines get blurred. Recently, an acquaintance decided to go in for breast enhancement surgery... Now, I don't know her intimately, and so I don't know all her thoughts or reasons behind this decision, but I do know that what got her thinking about it was another woman from her ward telling her that more than a few women in their ward had had similar surgeries. I have to be honest in my disappointment! I work with the young women in my ward, and I find that so many of the lessons are trying to emphasize that worldly approval are not as important as seeking eternal treasures. I try hard to let these young women know that their true beauty will shine from within. We teach that body piercings, tattoos, and immodesty are worldly trends that do not merit these girls' attention. How much will these girls pay heed to if they soon here of women in the ward seeking to alter their body image in what to me seems such a superficial way. Correct me if I'm wrong please! Now, I know the argument can be said, "What about make-up, braces, or hair color? Aren't those just as much worldly ways to change our appearance?" I don't know where exactly the line falls- I'm positive that I have paid more attention to worldly opinions than I should- but I think it is very different to improve for self-confidence purposes something that people see every time they look at you, than to change something that you should not draw attention to and holds sexual connotations. The whole thing has made me look more at my own self-perceptions, and what things I place great emphasis on.

Jake's employment has as of late proved very successful. As we look toward the future, we begin to see that we could afford things that we wouldn't have been able to in the past. We recently looked at a beautiful home that I fell in love with and began to dream about. As we looked more at our circumstances though, and all the responsibilities we have over that which we receive, trying to keep an honest perspective of the future and our goals; I began to see that the thought or dream was premature. It was still hard for me to let go of at first, because I know that the home could have been rationalized or afforded. I can say though, that what has made it easier is thinking about what making that jump right now in our lives would mean for our family. How many and what kind of children would live in that neighborhood. How would I keep my kids from feeling a sense of entitlement to those things that they would then see around them. Would I change my perspective on what our "needs" are? Would that move really change my level of happiness? If so, is that a good thing? What other opportunities might be afforded our family if we were to wait for such a "dream home"?

I want to make clear that I'm not saying that living in a "prominent" neighborhood and lifestyle is bad. I've known several very successful people who have stayed very humble servants to the Lord, and raised moral selfless children. What I'm saying is that because those kinds of people exist does not mean that we should all aspire to such things, and especially not expect to "have it all" all at once. If that kind of lifestyle does present itself- the challenge to keep perspective, include the Lord in all decisions, and instill children with the same perspective can be difficult. When we are blessed, do we feel "I deserve this" and quickly look for what's next on our wish list that we can get with that blessing? Or do we ask why the Lord has blessed us with it, how we can multiply it, and ask what HE would have us do with it? Are we constantly trying to keep up with our neighbors and the world? Do we know where our true joys and treasures are really coming from? Are we happy with ourselves and with what we have- or are we frustrated if we don't get what we want right away?

I've lived in very impoverished parts of the world (south texas, and Guatemala) and seen good people work very hard for very little- but continue to move forward with happy hearts and a positive attitude. I've also seen people in similar circumstances give up, complain that their needs are not met, and wait for a handout to fix their problem. I've seen very affluent people who seem to give and give, serve and serve. I've also seen very wealthy people who take and take, and become lazy. I don't pretend to understand why we are born where we are, or given what we are given (or withheld for that matter)- but I do know that what we do with what we receive and our attitudes towards what we have are important. I know that if some of the people I knew in Guatemala were to see my home and lifestyle they would probably be shocked... I know that I was shocked someone would think breast enhancement surgery was worth spending a large amount of money on....

Ugh. My thoughts are a little jumbled. Answers aren't easy. I just know that the world has more influence on us than I like. I am not perfect, but I try to be careful about how much influence the world has on me. I know this acquaintance would probably say the same thing.